


Lost In The Graveyard

by DrGairyuki



Category: RWBY
Genre: Bad Humor, Comedy, Costumes, Dark Comedy, Don't Examine This Too Closely, Don't Try This At Home, Fanfiction Comedy (MICF), Fic Graveyard, Gallows Humor, Halloween, Halloween Costumes, Haunting, Hilarious, Hilarity, Hilarity Ensues, Humor, Humorous Ending, Inappropriate Humor, Insanity, OOC, Out of Character, Over the Top, Randomness, References to Canon, Some Humor, references
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-29
Updated: 2019-10-30
Packaged: 2020-12-31 18:31:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21150269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DrGairyuki/pseuds/DrGairyuki
Summary: Hijinks in the graveyard sitting behind Port's house.Based on Homestar Runner's Most In The Graveyard and MissOliverAndBlossom's 2009 Halloween Special.





	1. Part 1

It was the day of Halloween (also known as Ruby's own birthday). The time where old stories and folk tales that tell of where the undead rise from their grave when they return from the cold and black darkness of death to haunt the land of the living with their own presence and where mythology creatures ran amongst the stars on the ground below the night sky in order to scare those of who see them with their own eyes (and beating the shit out of them to steal whatever candies they have before running off somewhere) all while the trick 'n' treaters will go house to house for candies that will given out to them (and also robbing the said people who were given them candies of their valuables before running off somewhere).

Beacon Academy was currently hosting a Halloween Party inside of the academy's ballroom, where all Team RWBY, Team JNPR, Team CVFY, Sun and Nepture, Penny, Ozpin, Glynda, and (Doctor) Oobleck (and Cardin) were invited to it since the party was being hosted by Peter Port himself and they were only who actually came to it. However, there was one problem with it: It was _boring_. It was so boring that it is the very exact opposite of exciting. So boring that even Penny and Dr. Oobleck were bored and weren't excited at all. So boring in fact that it acually make Port's own classes looked really exciting for once. In fact, this party was the very _definition _of boring itself right up at its finest level.

Everyone that have been invited to Peter Port's rather crappy attempt at hoisting Halloween party have a bored and dull expressions on every single one of their own faces and there was not a single different expressions on anyone of their faces in this party. Everyone from Jaune ([X](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Energizer_Bunny.png)), Pyrrha ([X](https://www.halopedia.org/File:HI_E3_2019_Trailer_John_117.PNG)), Nora (X), Dr. Oobleck ([X](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Indiana_Jones_in_Raiders_of_the_Lost_Ark.jpg)), Dusty [X](https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/madnesscombat/images/e/ec/HotDogVendor.png/revision/latest?cb=20140626152012) (which he was here for some reason), Cardin ([X](https://www.google.com/search?q=strong+sad&sxsrf=ACYBGNTs_A5UBgIdPv4MSQshG2-6eoaTWA:1572344117640&tbm=isch&source=iu&ictx=1&fir=iRXzlJHtxiksRM%253A%252CCX5oMJUI3AkpTM%252C_&vet=1&usg=AI4_-kSt7tyKrYST5pEohwy4gYYAnKd87w&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiYyeKknsHlAhXikYsKHdCzCScQ9QEwBXoECAYQDg#imgrc=iRXzlJHtxiksRM:)), Ozpin ([X](https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/david-attenborough_3377.jpeg)), Ren ([X](https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/kujoanime.png)), Sun ([X](https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/dragonball/images/c/c5/Goku_arrives.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20140205233734)) and Neptune ([X](https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/profile___philoctetes.jpg)), Coco ([X](https://wiki.teamfortress.com/wiki/File:Steam_Profile_Background_Heavy.png)), Velvet ([X](https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/fmabrizahawkeye.png)), Fox ([X](https://hokuto.fandom.com/wiki/File:Ichigo_Aji_Shuu.png)), Yatsuhashi ([X](https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/6ea559575176d490bb82ff9d5c7d3622.png)), Penny ([X](https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/hatsune_miku_art.png)), Glynda ([X](https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/konosuba_megumin.png)), Yang ([X](https://tfwiki.net/mediawiki/images2/1/1d/TVMGrimlockNov1985.jpg)), Blake ([X](https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/akame-ga-kill-leone_7849.jpg)), Weiss ([her costume is actually a exosuit that was covered in armors in order to best intimate and faithful that her costume is based on because she's a Schnee and just wanted to show off](https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/gundam/images/5/51/Rx-78gp02a.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20121114194544)), and Ruby ([X](https://images-wixmp-ed30a86b8c4ca887773594c2.wixmp.com/f/26cfa3b6-0dfe-4d6c-957d-3977db9d5d1b/d2dkhv4-0b8dedb1-aac0-40c8-84dc-8afc3e969934.jpg?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcLzI2Y2ZhM2I2LTBkZmUtNGQ2Yy05NTdkLTM5NzdkYjlkNWQxYlwvZDJka2h2NC0wYjhkZWRiMS1hYWMwLTQwYzgtODRkYy04YWZjM2U5Njk5MzQuanBnIn1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmZpbGUuZG93bmxvYWQiXX0.eCNxA57vVJB_IhGorpIVTkeHir8_DVbwZPdVhveqQoI)) were all sharing the same old bored-looking expressions on all of their faces at the dull party they were at in silence... before the red reaper finally broke the silence when she spoke.

"... Oh man, you guys, I can't believe we actually came to Professor Port's crappy Halloween party." Ruby said... suddenly (and somehow) speaking in a deep masculine voice that was quite similar to a certain popular internet video series that became a popular meme during the golden days of Youtube that her costume she is wearing was based on.

"Uh... Say again?" Weiss said, dumbfoundly and bafflingly confused at her partner's sudden vocal change of voice.

"Eh? Oh. Oh..." Ruby said when she was confused for a moment before she realized her voice was now suddenly different as she cough to herself to change her voice back to her normal high-pitch girly voice before she then told them of what she said in her usual voice. "I said I can't believe we actually came to Professor Port's crappy Halloween party."

"You girls are having a good time?" Peter Port asked Team RWBY, when he came over to them to reveal his costume... which is so clingy and squickly unsettling that it immediately become outright borderline disturbing to the point of burning your eyes to orange flames of melting them out of their sockets and cause your mind to crack into two pieces upon seeing the mere sight of it with your own aformention eyes due to costume that he have chosen and dress up as its opposite nature of the franchise's audience it was intended for that it was based on. Trust me, you _don't _want to know the rest of the detail.

"... Okay, two things: 1. Would you care to justify why you're dressing up as Hello Kitty this year?" Ruby questioned, both rather confused at his choice of dressing up as and pretty much disturb of what she is seeing of the same thing like the audience are after just thinking about it in all of their minds.

"Oh sure. I dress up as my favorite candy!"

"... Umm... I'm pretty sure those were erasers." Ruby remarked, commenting at what she've heard Peter Port have cheerful said, before she resume speaking and then told her Grimm Study class old professor during class. "And secondary: THIS PARTY SUCKS, FATSO!" Peter grasp as this suddenly cause the music to halt in a screeching recording stop and everyone in the room to stared at the reaper in flabbergasted and dumbfounded shock as if she suddenly grew two new heads like a Cerberus, all as Ruby told the old Grimm professor in irritation at this. "This is the most boring party that I have ever attended _NOT _in a coma! It's make your own Grimm studies classes that you're teaching in actually look exciting! And it's more of a disappointment than fruit stripe gum!" Cue to the flashback of showing Ruby holding the aforemention fruit stripe gum in her left hand in keen and curious interest as she then took it out of its wrapping and put in her mouth to chew in order to taste the flavor as she goes "mmm" before she then goes "aww" in disappointment. "I mean, THIS IS HALLOWEEN AND MY OWN BIRTHDAY FOR THE LOUD CRYING OUT OF! Where's the decaying flesh?! The rotting corpes?! THE STENCH OF DEATH!"

"Did someone called my name!?" Dusty asked, speaking like a old man with an whizzing and really old voice that he technially is.

"... Uh... Not exactly I/she was talking about." Team RWBY said in synchronize unison at the same time. Before then they realized that they spoke in synchronize unison. "Woah, that was weird." They realized they did it again. "That was weird too!"

"Well, fine!" Peter Port said, offended by what Ruby have said to him, as he then told Team RWBY. "If stinky dead things is all you want, why don't you go hang out in that 2-million year old 2000-acre graveyard that's been behind my house all this time!"

"UH-2000 ACRE-WWWHHHAAATTTT???!!!" Team RWBY shouted togther in synchronize unison again. Before they realized that they did it again. "Holy crap, we did it again!" There was a silence for about a second before they decide say something completely random. "YIPPEE KI YAA MOTHER*CKER!" They realized that they did it once again before they narrowed their eyes together and pointed their own fingers at each others. "Oooooooooo!"

* * *

RWBY

Halloween Special 2019

**LOST IN THE GRAVEYARD**

* * *

Soon, everyone came to the 2-million year old 2000-acre graveyard that's been sitting behind Peter Port's house all this time.

"We have an actually graveyard that have the graves that are actually unambigously have dead bodies in them unlike my own dead mom's? THIS IS BEYOND AWESOME!" Ruby shouted happily in utter excitment at the mere idea of it before she then ask a important question. "How come nobody ever told me about this place?"

"You didn't know about this place? Miss Rose, if it weren't for the liberary, i'd spend-"

"WE HAVE A _WHO CARES_?!"

"YES! IT STILL USE DEWEY DECIMAL AND EVERYTHING! AND-" Dr. Oobleck excitingly explained with his finger pointing upward before he interrupted himself in the middle of his sentence when he've suddenly realized something. He've been dupe. Like a jackass. Much to his chargin as he then readjusted his glasses at this. "Miss Rose... I absolutely _hate _it when you do that."

"Ah ha ha!" Ruby just laugh at tricking her history teacher into going on one of unnecessary long explanation before she then told the rest of her own team. "C'mon guys, let's make use of our degrading centered only on younger lives by finding a suitable stiff to exhume and reanimate."

"Ooh! I always wanted a zombie slave." Blake said, surprisingly enough, as Team RWBY then took one of the path and walked down it.

"Hey, me too!" Weiss said.

"And me too as well!" Yang said.

Jaune talked to his team and Cardin (Because he got nothing else better to do) as Team CVFY pass by them with Sun and Neptune tagging along with them as he told both his team and Cardin of what they were going about to do. "Oh man, Pyrrha, Nora, Ren, and Cardin. This is gonna be so great. First we'll hit Space Mountain, then over to Mr. Toad's, then Tom Sawyer's Island, and don't forget: we parked in the Goofy lot!"

"YAY!" Nora cheered.

"That sound like a lot of fun." Pyrrha said.

"Aahhh... Ren? Jaune seems a little... I don't know. Loopy today, don't you think?" Cardin asked Ren standing right next to in concern and weirded out by this.

"Oh gee, how long did it take for you to figure that out, Sherlock?" Ren snarked at the bully of Beacon Academy before he then told him. "With the script for an Spruce Willus movie that he had enter a few month ago being famous and the majority of RWBY fanfictions focusing on him on the internet nowaday, his mind is racing like he's in a NASCAR turn that never ends."

"Oh, I thought it was because he was overusing the whazzap foundation again."

"What's up?" Jaune said confused.

"Wazza?" Nora said confused.

"No No. You're suppose to say like WHAZZAAAAAAAAAAAP!!!"

"WHAZZAAAAAAAAAAAP!!!"

"WHAZZAAAAAAAAAAAP!!!"

"WHAZZAAAAAAAAAAAP!!!" Shouted the utterly pointless cameos of Mike and Marty the Chibi Beowovles and Floyd the Chibi Geist from RWBY Chibi, Caboose and The Meta from Red Vs Blue, Nemesis from gen:Locker, Dracula from the original Bram Stroker novel of the same name, Frankenstein from Frankenstein, Micheal Myers from Halloween, Jason Voorhees from Friday the 13th, Freddy Kruger from Nightmare on Elm Street, Shield Liger and Gojulas and Liger Zero from Zoids, Puck from Berserk, Shin Godzilla from the Godzilla, Zaku II from Gundam, Hank and Tricky from Madness Combat, Felicia from Darkstalkers, Pengula from the Ultraman, Brock from The Venture Bros, Rogers from American Dad, James the Red Enigne from the Railway Series and Thomas the Tank Engine, Trigger from Winnie-The-Pooh, The Pirates Tugboats from TUGS, Max from Sam & Max, Trevor Phillips from Grand Theft Auto, Sharptooth from the Land Before Time, Donkey Kong from Donkey Kong, King Kong from King Kong, Ultimate Blue-eyes Dragon from Yu-Gi-Oh!, Ink-girl and Octo-girl from the Splatoon 1 and Splatoon 2, Stygian Zinogre from Monster Hunters, Principle Kuno from Ranma 1/2, Machinedramon from Digimon, Mega Ultra Chicken from YU-Gi-Oh! Abridged, Abridged!Nappa from Dragon Ball Z Abridged, Sterling Archer from Archer, Abridged!Alucard from Hellsing Abridged, Bojack from Bojack, Redman from That 70s Show, Kitten Kong from the Goodies, Sadaharu from Gintama, Monocyte from Cells At Works!, a random bandit from Hokuto No Ken, Dan from Street Fighter, the Killer rabbit and the Black Knight from Monty Python and the Holy Grail, Blade from Needless, Soundwave from Transformer, Suu from Monster Musume, Luna Varga from Demon Warrior Luna Varga, Heavy and Demoman from Team Fortress 2, Greed from Fullmetal Alchemist, Spiderman from Spiderman, Excel from Excel Saga, Raikou from Pokemon, Infinity Sword Elsword from Elsword, Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo and Don Patch and Jelly Jigger from Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo, Male Xellos from Slayers, Pen Pen from Neon Genesis Evangelion, Luffy from One Piece, Nuku Nuku from All Purpose Cultural Cat Girl Nuku Nuku, Goshinki from Inuyasha, Eggman from Sonic the Hedgehog, Ashia from Outlaw Stars, Alduin from Skyrim, Lucoa from Miss Kobayashi's Dragon Maid, Mako from Kill La Kill, Amaterasu from Okami, the Goblins from Goblin Slayers, Smaug and Ancalagon from J.R.R. Tolkien's legendarium, Sandor Clegene from a Song of Fire and Ice, Firestar from Warrior Cats, Cat Noir from Miraculous Ladybug, Shugo from .Hack, Joker from Batman, Phalanx from Shadow of the Colossus, Bakugo from My Hero Acemdia, Saitama from One Punch Man, SCP-173 from SCP Foundation, Haruko from FLCL, Twinnova from the Legend of Zelda, TROGDOR the BURNiNATOR from Homestar Runner, Metal Gear Rex and Ray from Metal Gear, Captain Jack Sparrow from Pirates of the Caribbean, the Guy from the band Disturbed, Dark Sora from Kingdom Heart, Bitey from Brackenwood, Kefka from the Final Fantasy series, Deadpool from Deadpool, Lobo from Lobo, the Tank from Left 4 Dead, the Styder from the Half Life series, Pewdiepie, Devilman from Devilman, Dante from Devil May Cry, Eve from the Black Cat manga, Darkness from Konosuba, Male Maze from Maze the Megaburst Space, Shizuya from Trials In Tainted Space, and Mink from Dragon Half, out of no where before suddenly disappearing back to whatever they came from.

This cause Team JNPR and Cardin just stared in shocked silence with buy-eyed expressions of what have just happen right now for a few moments... before Ren finally broke the silence when he've finally spoke and took out a clipboard in his hand. "... Okay... That's checks off a bunch of creepy things that popped out of nowhere number 37."

"A THIRTY SEVEN?!"

Jaune, Pyrrha, and Nora then fainted, much to Ren's chargin at this evidence by the popped red vein on his forehead.

* * *

"Hey, Ozpin?" Port asked.

"Yes, Professor Port?"

"You think I should have told everyone about that onmivorous sword wrist-wielding Undead Mutant Wizard Ninja Dragon-Transforming Humanoid Alien Robot from space that prowls the yard?"

"Oh please Professor Port. Don't be silly, everyone knows that there is no such thing as a undead robot as they don't exist anyway... I think... or at least they shouldn't be..." Ozpin said in deep thought with his head looking right up, deciding to make a mental note to himself to double-check to make sure that undead robots don't actually exist, before he then decide switch the subject and ask Port a important question. "By the way Professor Port, are you sure that the Vault would be actually attacked by the same ones who attacked Amber while I am away?"

"Oh, don't worry, Ozpin. I've already got that covered. I have already given false informations out about where the one of the other Maidens are in Mistral for Halloween, so they won't be back for a while."

"... You've tricked them into going to an anime convention with the rest of Team CRDL, didn't you?"

"Bingo. X3"

Cue to where Cinder, Emerald, and Mercury currently are at the moment.

"AAH!"

"GRAGH!"  
"ARGH!"

* * *

Cut to one part of the graveyard where Penny, Glynda, and Dr. Oobleck were in as the history teacher told the robot girl and woman.

"All right now, Penny and Glynda. Remember, we have to hold our breath in front of the dead. Ready? GO!" Dr. Oobleck then immediately suck in his air and hold his breath... for only about a second before suddenly puffing out loudly and start gasping for air. "*_PANT!_* Okay, *_PANT!_* Never mind! *_PANT!_* Sorry the dead!"

"This place is perfect for my photography!" Penny said cheerfully at this.

"Photography at this point of time?" Glynda questioned with a raised eyebrow.

"Yeah, my dad seemed to be obsessed with places that might haunted with ghost or any other paranormal activity like that for some unknown reason." Penny answered before she resume speaking about her photography. "I've already hit the warehouse, the railroad tracks, and the abandoned factory! This will complete my amateur trifica!"

"Hang on! I THINK I GOT IT!" Dr. Oobleck shouted before he tried to hold his breath again... which failed again when he exhaled loudly and start gasping again as Penny and Glynda gave him a blank deadpanned look on their faces.

* * *

"Hey look, Velvet! There's your great-great-grandpappy's cousin Hatchet Harald! He discover the bait and switch!" Coco said to her girlfriend when she pointed it out with her left finger pointing at a gravestone which said "Hatchet Harald - Bait and Switch".

"Yes, Coco. That's my great-great-grandpappy's cousin's own grave, alright." Velvet said with a bush on her face, feeling a bit embarrassed by Coco of her pointing out the graves of her own decreased relatives.

"Ooh, and this is his brother Mort The White! He invented 'No Huntings Down'." Coco said as she pointed her finger to another gravestone beside Hatchet Harald's gravestone which said "Mort The White - No Huntings Down".

"... How we got stuck hanging around with you I'll never know." Neptune said to himself as he and Sun shared a bored look on their faces.

"You know, all of these dead non-existing relatives of Velvet are making wanna start one of them horror-core rap groups." Sun said, attempting to cheer his pal up from this. "We could put on ourselves some hockey masks and called ourselves SUNBEEGAZOR AND NEPBEEGAZOR MORTIZZZZZZ!"

"OI!" Coco and Velvet were offended by that. "Show some respect!" Both of them pointed to a third grave, which said "SUNBEEGAZOR AND NEPBEEGAZOR - Another relative of Velvet's".

* * *

"Alright, Pyrrha, Nora, Ren, and the guy who always get his ass kicked." Cardin then made a "T_T" while gaving off smokes of grumpiness from his head as Jaune continue to speak. "Now that I know we're not in the theme park, I say try and find that special Grimm me and Nora heard about. I heard if you find him right at midnight, he'll spin all your Halloween candies into golds!"

"Yeah!" Nora said happily before she then. "Let's hope he'll do that instead of that regular old creepy Halloween music theme type deal."

"Oh, you mean like this? Ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding ding-"

Cue to a pissed off-looking giant white Beowolf suddenly looming over out of them. "**_DON'T SING MY SONG!!!!_**"

"AAAAHHHH!!!" Jaune and Nora screamed up at it in complete fear and sheer terror while their tongue were holding a sign with a yellow screaming face on it with the other three also looking in complete fear, utter horror, and sheer terror at it as well.

"Sorry, make that 38." Ren said to himself as he checked it off on his clipboard.

Pyrrha just continue to stared up at where once the pissed off-looking giant white Beowolf was looming over at in frozen fear with her left eye twitching at this until she extended her left hand out and slapped herself out of its before she spoke and suggested. "How about we check over by that spooky-looking hill over there?"

"Hey, that's a great place to start looking!" Jaune said as he, Pyrrha, and Nora start walking forward through the graveyard toward the aforemention spooky-looking hill before the blonde human boy himself then decided to comment on something. "I wonder why they call it Snarling Hungry Undead Mutant Wizard Ninja Dragon-Transforming Humanoid Alien Robot Hill?" He asked himself, just as they alreadt pass by a sign that said "Snarling Hungry Undead Mutant Wizard Ninja Dragon-Transforming Humanoid Alien Robot Hill" on it...

...All before Cardin then suddenly interrupt. "Uh- Uh- G- G- Uh- Uh- Ga- Ga- Uh- Uh- Ga- Ga- GUYS?! Uh, HELLO?! The special Grimm?! Is standing over there!" He said when he attempt to point it out to the three of them with his fingers pointed along an random arrow mark that have appear out of utterly no where to emphasis it toward where the giant white Beowolf from before is sitting at with a ticked off expression on his face. "Want to make more sense to just-"

"Cardin, how many times do we have to tell you? Making sense does not exist anymore."

Cardin just stood in silence... before he let out one word in a low pitch voice in shocked of what he heard that is summed up perfectly to the point that he sound like the Nostalgia Critic when he have reacted to that particular one scene in his Adventure of Sonic the Hedgehog review that have became a meme. "WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!?!"

"It was written out of the dictionary back in two thousand and five minutes ago. Along with: Confuzzled, Snirt, and Lingweenie." Jaune then looked at the three words that he've mention and roared at them with foams in his mouth, causing the three words to run for their lives, before he resume telling Cardin. "So from this point forward, it is currently illegal to bring any logic into any storylines whatsoever. Beside, it would save the writer times and money."

"But wouldn't that just piss off all of our viewers and readers and send our rating to the ground?" Pyrrha questioned.

"Yep."

"Let's do it. >:3" Pyrrha grinned.

"Geez, all this nonsensical talk is just like watching continuous reruns of One Piece and Pokémon in 4kids english dub form. It was completely meaningless and made my brain throw up." Cardin said. The moment that he said that, Ren decide to walk away from the former bully of Beacon Academy to avoid the ensuring carnage.

"ATTACKED THE SENSE-BELIEVER!" Jaune, Pyrrha, and Nora all yelled with the crazy insanity in their eyes in their craze bloodlust toward Cardin while all holding their respective weapons in their hands.

This cause Cardin to stretch and pop his eyes to out of their sockets and screamed in horror at this just like a girl in a 1950s horror B movie as he hold a sign that said "Oh no! I is gonna get hurt! D:". Cue to the big dust cloud ball that was suddenly kicked up of cartoony violence with various yelling and screaming coming from it.

And then cue to the Big Lipped Alligator Moment of where the mutant version of a Beowolf, A Ursa, an Apathy, a Beringel, a Boarbatusk, a Blind worm, a Centinel, a Creep, a Deathstalker, a Goliath, a King Taijitu, a Leviathan, a Manticore, a Nuckelavee, a Sabyr, a Sphinx, and a Wyvern were suddenly dancing to the song of Saori Sakura - True My Heart.

* * *

Cut to where Team RWBY were as Weiss spoke.

"I mean, just look at some of these names." Weiss said when she pointed it out to the rest of her teammates before she then spoke the names on the grave's tombstones. "Doogariangly Stooljigger? Mistricus Screamus?"

"And Big Proof?" Blake said when she saw it.

"Was there some secret period in history when hobos and awesome rappers ruled the earth that we're unaware of?" Yang questioned. This cause Weiss and Blake merely reply to her question to this with shrugging their shoulders.

"Guys! You said we'd get a zombie slave soon! So I can **FIRIN' MAH LAZER!!**" Ruby then fired her lazer from her mouth.

Weiss, Blake, and Yang were now covered in soots and ashes from head to toe with cross-eyed expressions on their faces... before Weiss coughed and manage to speak to Ruby, albeit in pain.

"... *COUGH!* Don't worry, Doctor Rubygonapus. *COUGH!*" Weiss groaned in pain as she told their team leader. "We will. We just gonna find somebody with a cool name. Let's keep looking- *COUGH!* -and maybe find some orintment."

Blake and Yang were silence for a second before the both of them cough out a smoke that said 'Teen spirit' and then resume their cross-eyed expressions.

* * *

Then back to where Penny, Glynda, and Dr. Oobleck were right now.

"Almost... a little less lurk, and a little more skulk."

"You like _this_?" Glynda then give more shulk to her frown expression.

"_There _we go!" Penny said cheerfully as her eyes then flashed. The picture then developed to show the image of the scene that she have took... except for the fact that Glynda herself was somehow shown missing from the same spot she was standing in the photo. "Huh. You're not showing up in these picture, Ms. Goodwitch." Penny and Dr. Oobleck then pull up the other photo of the same thing in their hands, which all of which show that Glynda was somehow absent in all of the photo she was in that Penny have took shots of, looking both confused and puzzled by this development, before the green-haired history teacher then spoke to his colleague.

"Glynda, is there something you need to tell us?" Dr. Oobleck asked. "Are you dead?"

"Whoa, maybe I am... or at least that's what that Texas-based online-focused video studio production that must never be named _pays _me to think." Glynda said.

KRAKOW!

Suddenly, a ball of shining light suddenly appeared out of utterly no where!

_YOU DO NOT BELONG IN THIS SHOW, GLYNDA GOODWITCH OF RWBY!_

"I don't...?"

_YOU WILL BECOME PART OF YOUR OWN SHOW IN 2063 AND THRIVE!_

"I will...!?"

_Pfft. Nah. Birds._

Glynda then got attacked by birds. "AAAHHHH!!!!!!" And then she died.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Okay, I was wanting to do a Most In The Graveyard from Homestar Runner with RWBY characters. If you understand all of the references, then good for you. Why did I did this? Because for fun.


	2. Part 2

"Hey, guys! Check this out!" Sun called out to Team CVFY with Neptune standing by his side. "Velvet is not the only one with relatives here. My and Neptune's respective great good aunt is buried right under our feets!"

"Hey, you guys come over here and look at this!" Coco said with her girlfriend Velvet standing beside her before Fox and Yatsuhashi came into view as she then told them. "Me and Velvet (well, mostly me) want to see our respective great great granduncles who were friends! My great great granduncle invented the Gatling Gun!"

"Hi there." Neptune said as he and Sun tap Coco and Velvet's shoulders... from the _right _side. Team CVFY's eyes widen at this before they looked over and saw standing on the other side of the grave they were currently at.

"Wait, hold on a sec!" Velvet said, as realization slowly seep and came into both her, Coco, Sun, and Nepture's minds at this with their own eyes widen over this. "Are you telling us that our own respective uncles are your respective aunts."

"Seems that way." Sun and Neptune answered casually at this at the same time with normal expressions before their eyes then widen again when they've realized something about this. "But... does that mean... we're sidlings?!"

"No! It also probably means that you're lying!" Coco told them bluntly as she and Velvet give both of them an angry ">:(" expressions on their faces at this before the two girls of different speices then give an impassive "T_T" expressions to Sun and Neptune when the sunglass-wearing girl herself have then explained and pointed it out to them. "Beside, even if it _were _true, we'd be only sixth-fourth-second-fifth cousins, thrice removed!"

"Yeah, and we even don't look remotely like each other anyways!"

This cause both Sun and Neptune to sigh in relief at what they heard from the two girls. "Oh. Phew! So your respective sisters and us can-"

"GRAH!" Coco and Velvet growled when they kicked Sun and Neptune right in the Dust.

"OWIE!"

* * *

"SMICKDICE?!" Ruby shouted in disbelief when she saw of what is on the gravestone of this grave that said "Heres lies Smickdice" as she ranted at this. "What is wrong with you, dead people?! I don't want to reanimate a corpse named _Smickdice _doing our bidding! Doesn't any-dead-body with a good name around here want to be reanimated with these jumper cable and pickled monkey fingers!?" The red reaper complained about this, just as cue to Weiss' summoned Arma Gigas holding up the items she've mention when she have said them.

Blake was thinking her thoughts deeply in silence, mentally debating with herself, before she was struck with thunder when she suddenly got a idea like a lightbulb being switch on and shouted in happiness with a happy face and raised her waving hand. "OH! ZGOR! I VOTE ZGOR!"

Ruby, Weiss, Yang, and Weiss' summoned Arma Gigas just looked at Blake in awkward silence with a pure blank confused WTF expressions on all of their faces. A beat of awkward silence between Team RWBY with cricket chirping in the background have passed by a moment later... before the Red and White duo looked at each other when they then said the same thing. "What a terrible excuse for a joke!"

"But its my only other line!" Blake whined.

"Yeah. And it's about as useless as my uncle taking my old headmaster at Signal Academy who was also his a third year classmate when he came's daughter to prom."

Cue to the flashback of showing Qrow taking Ruby's old headmaster at Signal Academy who was also his third year classmate when he came's daughter to prom at Signal Academy as she spoke to the crow guy with the bad luck semblance. "Thanks for dinner, Mister Qrow. So exotic. I mean, blowfish on a stick?"

Suddenly....

_DADGRASP!!! ...'D!!! _

Qrow was suddenly grasp by Ruby's old headmaster at Signal Academy who was also his third year classmate when he came and was drag over to him, revealing to him to having a plum figure to himself, before he then spoke to Qrow when he've told the drunken crow. "So okay, Ro-May-O, you think you're so great? Captain of the combat force or whatever? You lay one finger on my daughter, I GUT YOU LIKE SHEEP!" This what freaked Qrow out.

Cut to show a grassy field where a couple of sheeps (and a sheep faunus for extra measure) were laying on their backs were gutted. "It's notaaaa so badaaaaa."

"No, i'm a joke." Ruby's old headmaster at Signal Academy who was also his third year classmate when he came said to Qrow. "Gonna married my little girl?" Then he suddenly pop up from the ceiling. "I gut you like sheep!" Then from the left side. "How much you make?" Then from the other side. "I gut you like sheep!" Then back to before. "Got good knees?" Then back to his orignal position. "I gut you like sheep!" Then he show the drunken crow half of a old radio. "Half stereo two seventy-five... like sheeps!"

"Hehehehehe." Qrow nerviously chuckled at what he heard Ruby's old headmaster at Signal Academy who was also his third year classmate when he came said to him before he told his old classmate. "I can assure you Brad Braxlin, my old friend. I never have able played a single game of death in my entire life-"

"I GUT YOU LIKE SHEEP!" Ruby's old headmaster at Signal Academy who was also his third year classmate when he came then gutted Qrow like sheep.

"AHHHHHH! SHEEP, YOU LIED!" Qrow shouted before he've hit the floor. "AHHH! THE PAIN, IN SPAIN, LIES MAINLY ON MY GUT!(?)" Yeah... I don't know what he's exactly meant or getting at either...

* * *

Back to Jaune, Pyrrha, Nora, Ren, and Cardin. All of them were currently peeping right behind a large grave stone that they were at while for the special Halloween grimm.

"Alright all you four, it's almost midnight." Jaune said before he asked Nora and Ren. "Ready with the Halloween candies?"

"Got it right here, Jaune!" Nora answered cheerfully when she and Ren then lifted up and shown the five fulled bags worth of Halloween candies in them to the other three.

However, unknown to all five of them, breathings inside one of the bushes that were nearby with whatever was hidden focusing its target on them can be heard distinctively.

"Man, I can't wait to try out gold whatchamacallits. Gold... Oh yeah, Snickers."

"Yeah, you just keep telling yourself that." Cardin said sarcastically.

"Oh, maybe I will keep telling myself that."

At that moment, something suddenly bursted and jumped out of the brush that it was hiding inside into the night sky with the shattered moon lingering in it and landed onto the ground before the Undead Mutant Wizard Ninja Dragon-Transforming Humanoid Alien Robot (looking like a skeletal version of this [X](https://www.bigbadtoystore.com/Product/VariationDetails/66324?utm_source=youtube&utm_campaign=Jobbythehong)) revealing itself in full form in front of Team JNPR and Cardin, unleashed its terrifying skeletal and metallical roar at them. "_RRRRRRAAAAAWWWWWWRRRRRR!!!!!!!_"

"AAAHHHHH! THE UNDEAD ROBOT GOT RABIES AGAIN!" Both JNPR and Cardin screamed in utter fear and sheer terror.

Jaune, Pyrrha, and Nora immediately pulled their respective weapons Crocea Mors, Miló and Akoúo̱, and Magnhild out of no where to faced it and attack it. However, the Undead Mutant Wizard Ninja Dragon-Transforming Humanoid Alien Robot suddenly extend a blade out of its dragon's head on its left hand and immedlately give out swiftly a million slashes to their respective weapons all at once in a mere second, causing their respective weapons to turn to dust after it was finished.

The three just stared in shocked silence with an shocked wide and bug-eyed expressions that were wide as dish plates on their face at what happened to their weapons before Jaune and Pyrrha instantly cling to each other while Nora immediately jumped into Ren's arms in fear. JNP and Cardin start tembling in utter fear at this. Ren stared at this before he pulled out his weapon Stormflower and mentally debate with himself about using his respective weapons before deciding against using them as he knew that they would be useless against of what they were facing against exactly. All as the Undead Mutant Wizard Ninja Dragon-Transforming Humanoid Alien Robot let out another of its terrifying skeletal and metallical roar at them.

"_RRRRRRAAAAAWWWWWWRRRRRR!!!!!!!_"

Both Coco and Velvet were angrily currently beating the absolutely shit out of both Sun and Neptune, now sporting various injuries, brusies, and a few black eyes on them and being held by the collars of their shirts, with their eyes now glowing raging red that made the two boys looked in sheer terror at them before they were snapped out of their rage temporary for a moment when they suddenly heard the Undead Mutant Wizard Ninja Dragon-Transforming Humanoid Alien Robot's roar and looked in confusion at this. "What was that?"

"I don't know, but I think that was-" Coco and Velvet then punched both Sun and Neptune at the same time respectively across their faces with their respective fists to shut them up.

"Oh my goodness!" Doctor Oobleck said when he and Penny were distracted from Glynda's dead body laying on the ground with a "X_X" expression on her face.

"Zwei, you got rabies again?" Ruby asked surprised and confused. Zwei barked in confusion at this. Because the last time he has rabies, Ozpin lost his previous body. It was a weird Monday.

"Uh oh. Let's beat it, Griff." Ozpin told Peter Port upon hearding the Undead Mutant Wizard Ninja Dragon-Transforming Humanoid Alien Robot's roar.

"OI! I thought I told you never called me by that name of that lazy soldier from Red Vs Blue again!" Port said angrily before he then turn to Grif standing behind him and told him. "Sorry, but no offence Grif."

Team JNPR and Cardin continue to temble and standing still in utter fear and sheer terror at facing the wrath and fury of the Undead Mutant Wizard Ninja Dragon-Transforming Humanoid Alien Robot from space.

"Seriously, Ren-Ren." Ren then slowly turn his eyes to looked at Nora before she told him. "I'm about to pee my pant."

"_RRRRRRAAAAAWWWWWWRRRRRR!!!!!!!_"

The Undead Mutant Wizard Ninja Dragon-Transforming Humanoid Alien Robot let out another of its terrifying skeletal and metallical roar for the third at them in its wrath and fury toward Team JNPR and Cardin, causing to closed all of their eyes for the inevitable.

Before the Undead Mutant Wizard Ninja Dragon-Transforming Humanoid Alien Robot itself could do anything to Team JNPR and Cardin and could attack all four of them at once that will be their end for certain, something suddenly flies down from the night sky with the shattered moon hanging in it and lands on top of the Undead Mutant Wizard Ninja Dragon-Transforming Humanoid Alien Robot's back with the sound of "_CRASH!_" made by it, causing its head to pop it off and sending its body down to the earth of the graveyard by the sheer force and impact of whatever landed on it.

Everything was now suddenly silence once more. Team JNPR and Cardin slowly pry open one of their eyes to take a sneak peek of what have exactly saved from the wrath and fury of the Undead Mutant Wizard Ninja Dragon-Transforming Humanoid Alien Robot... all before they all snapped their eyes wide open in shock at what they are seeing, JNR and Cardin's own eyes snapping open more wider even than a flying saucer in shock with Ren just staring blankly in shocked silence at seeing both what have saved them and what is the special Grimm exactly in shock, all fo them were so shocked at both what have saved them and what is the special Grimm exactly that Jaune, Pyrrha, and Nora literally dropped their jaws to the ground and all of their tongues spelled "HO. LY. CRAP." respectively.

Because what the special halloween Grimm that two of Team JNPR they were looking and have saved both Team JNPR and Cardin themselves from the Undead Mutant Wizard Ninja Dragon-Transforming Humanoid Alien Robot itself was... A Creep (the Grimm species, not a stalker!). With a orange-colored Samhain symbol of a triquetra on its forehead.

"What the-?! WE'RE SAVED BY A CREEP?! THE SPECIAL HALLOWEEN GRIMM WE'RE LOOKING FOR WAS A CREEP?!" Pyrrha shouted in shocked at this, her eyes still wide in shocked at what transpire.

"HOW THE HELL SOMETHING THAT WEAK KILLED SOMETHING THAT IS NOT SUPPOSE TO EXIST AT ALL?!" Cardin yelled in confusion at what they were seeing with their own eyes.

"HOORAY! The Halloween Creep! You saved us!" Jaune said suddenly cheerfully.

"YAY! We're saved!" Nora said cheerfully, making Ren look at their sudden change of attitude with a bemused look on his face.

"Now are you gonna turn all of our 100 grands into a hundred grands?" Jaune asked, both he and Nora excitly.

The Halloween Creep was silence for a moment... before he shake his head in a "no".

"But we thought at midnight you-" Jaune and Nora said upsettingly.

"Grrraaa." The Halloween Creep growl, said to them by telling them that he'll only do that if Halloween is on either a Saturday or a Sunday. Today is a Monday. And it hate Monday.

"Oh, man!" Jaune and Nora said in disappointment at what they heard.

Grrraaa." The Halloween Creep said he'll give them this through. Cue to the Halloween Creep dancing to the Spooky Scary Skeleton Remix song by Tombstone with lights showing up out of no where and shine everywhere, immediately showing off some rather impressive dance moves that woud make Jaune look like a complete amataur compare to the Halloween Creep despite only having two limbs that are used as mostly its legs on top of the Undead Mutant Wizard Ninja Dragon-Transforming Humanoid Alien Robot.

"Hooray! Extended dance song remix of Spooky Scary Skeleton!"

Soon, Jaune, Pyrrha, Nora, Ren, and even Cardin join in, dancing to the Spooky Scary Skeleton Remix song by Tombstone with the Halloween Creep, with Jaune showing off his own dance moves at the Beacon dance as he was dancing with Pyrrha while Nora and Ren were dancing with each other as the green-colored man pull out Stormflowers in his hands.

Team RWBY then came into the area and walking in that they were dancing at when they have suddenly heard the Spooky Scary Skeleton Remix song coming from it before Yang saw the dead body of the Undead Mutant Wizard Ninja Dragon-Transforming Humanoid Alien Robot when she look down and found it while the Halloween Creep was dancing right on top of it and she immediately reacted to it. "Woah, look at that guys! Check out that awesome Undead Mutant Wizard Ninja Dragon-Transforming Humanoid Alien Robot with that Creep dancing on it!"

That was when Port suddenly came out of no where and tell them about one of the rumored origins of the Undead Mutant Wizard Ninja Dragon-Transforming Humanoid Alien Robot from space. "Some say it's an escaped laboratory experiment test subject for a failed experiment project of a weapon experiment test program gone wrong during the Great War. They called it 'Nerco Transformer Dragon Xenomorph XXX'."

Team RWBY were all completely awestruck with an look of awe by that name of the Undead Mutant Wizard Ninja Dragon-Transforming Humanoid Alien Robot itself when they heard it.

"That. May be. The coolest name that I never heard of!" Ruby said, being most struck by this, before this immediately got all of Team RWBY excited by this as their team leader told them. "WEISS! Grab the jumper cables and-" Weiss' summoned Arma Gigas immediately hold up the jumper cables in its left hand. "Hey, wait a minute..." Team RWBY and Weiss' summoned Arma Gigas then looked around in confusion. "Where'd the pickled monkey fingers go?"

"IIIIII DOOOOOON'T KNOOOOOOW!!!" Peter Port lied as he manage to ran somehow faster than either Ruby or Doctor Oobleck through the graveyard to his house before immediately going into his house and locking the door behind him.

"Well, I have it's safe to say... Happy Halloween and Birthday to Ruby, Jaune." Ren said.

"You said it, old buddy! Happy Carousel of Progess, Ren!" Ren then looked annoyed at him. "I mean, Halloween, Ren. Happy Halloween, Ren." Ren return to his usual neutrel expression.

Also... In Loving Memory of Glynda Goodwitch, who willed herself to death 10/31/80... or what we paid her to think...

Also, Port found out that the ketchup in the ketchup foundation that he had brought from online wasn't actually ketchup.


End file.
